Be Careful Where You Spend Your Dollars
Not Every Mental Health Advisor Has Your Best Interest At Heart
I have been reading a lot lately, which if you know me isn’t something I do, and there is one article that I won’t share, that really pissed me off. It’s an article written by a white man bragging about how much money he’s getting for sending out reminders to meditate, and he’s calling himself a “guru.”
(in Hinduism and Buddhism) a spiritual teacher, especially one who imparts initiation.
Here’s the thing: The idea of a “Guru” is Indian, and it’s incredibly offensive to call yourself a guru when you are a white man, but most people who are selling “mental health solutions” don’t get that. They’re too busy cashing the cheques.
Mental Health is big business, and it bloody well should be, but the problem is that there isn’t really a solid foundation for what “mental health” should look like, which leaves a lot of people questioning their life choices.
Give yourself some grace, because not everyone who is selling mental health is on your side. Most of them — and I say this rigidly — are out there trying to make money and they are “selling” mental health solutions because they know that you’ll buy into them looking for hope.
Looking for something or anything, to inspire you to believe you can keep going, and you can, and I’m not saying that these people don’t deserve to make money, of course, they do. Everyone deserves to make money, I’m just asking you to think critically about the content you are consuming.
Too many times we buy into these “celebrity” type Bloggers, Content Creators, and “mental health experts”, and then when their world comes crashing down we feel offended and angry because we trusted them. Even if we didn’t talk to them directly, we’ve bought into their substack, their Patreon, and everything they are selling because they say something that connects to the way that we’re feeling.
From now on instead of buying into every single white person telling you they know how to solve your problems, start giving yourself some grace. Start thinking critically about what your problems are.
The only questions you need to ask yourself going forward are:
- What is the situation you are currently struggling with?
- What can you do about it “right” this second?
- What do you need to move forward?
Once you figure out the answers to those three questions, you can figure out how to break everything you need to do to answer them into small chunks, and suddenly life becomes a little bit easier.
For instance, I can’t deep clean my house because it’s overwhelming, but what I can do is ten minutes a day every day until the jobs that I need to do are done. Ten minutes a day are easy for me, two hours a day not so much.
When it comes to our mental health, it’s absolutely imperative that we stop looking for “get healthy quick” schemes. Yes working out, meditation, taking walks, smoking less, and eating healthier can all help with our mental health but sometimes it takes a little extra work to get there, and that has to be okay.
Give yourself the time you need to heal if that’s what you need to do and give yourself patience. These are gifts that cannot be ignored when we are searching to find our footing again after we’ve been traumatized, regardless of the reason that we’ve been traumatized.
There are a million and one ways for me to suggest breathing exercises, and behavioral modification, but first and foremost the one thing you have to learn to do on a regular basis is to check in with yourself.
When you wake up in the morning take ten minutes to think about how you’re feeling, and what you need for the day. I don’t mean what you need to do, I mean what you as a single individual person need?
I’m not going to say that these white people don’t have good intentions, but when I read someone bragging about making more than 70k for sending out a single email that my six-year-old Godson could write, I get offended.
These are not people who care about your mental health, they care about using your vulnerable position to make money and that’s why I am so focused on talking about mental health on LoudMouthBrownGirl.Com.
I want you, as someone who is struggling with mental health, to find people who are genuine in their efforts to show you ways that might help you heal. I want you to find people who genuinely care about the content they are creating instead of people who are bragging about how much money they’re “raking in” taking advantage of those who are looking for support and love.
Dealing with mental health issues can be incredibly difficult, it can feel like you’re being gaslit by your own brain sometimes, and finding ways to escape the cycle of anxiety/depression/PTSD can be mind-blowingly frustrating.
It can often feel like we’re alone and that no one understands, and when that happens we open our wallets and pay for promises of help that often don’t work out.
I remember someone I love very much getting scammed, they were in a delicate position and were offered money, the only string was that they had to put $1000 upfront…they never saw a dime of that money again. Of course, my brain went to all the places of “how could you?” and then it hit me…desperate people do desperate things, and of course, this person was taken advantage of.
I’m not blaming them at all — they were in a position and they thought they’d get some help, but instead, they got screwed. This happens a lot in the mental health industry and we’re not talking about it.
The next time you’re reading or consuming content by “Mental Health Gurus” ask yourself if the information you’re paying for could be consumed by a mental health patient who not only has your best interest at heart but could greatly use those dollars you are spending.
I know it seems silly but at the end of the day when it comes to your mental health, why take risks on people who clearly have no real connection to the problems that you’re facing.
There are solutions out there that won’t cost you an arm and a leg, you just have to make enough space in your brain to focus on finding people who are worth your money and your time.
Sending all my love,
Devon J Hall